dreams keep me sane

I believe dreaming keeps my mind under control. What is a dream? Wikipedia defines a dream as a “succession of images, ideas, emotions and sensations occurring involuntarily in the mind during certain stages of sleep.” I don’t think so; I think dreams are a sanctuary. Slipping into a dream, I am safe from worrying about my friends. I don’t know why but I always seem to get worked up when I see my friends screwing up their lives. However, I am only safe for around 8 hours.

After I finish playing my online video games around 2 A.M., I go brush my teeth, set my iHome, turn on my fan, and go to bed. Let the dreaming begin! To be honest, I really do look forward to going to bed every night; something about it just excites me; it’s kind of like how a dog gets excited when he gets a new chew toy. Usually, I have dreams where I performing dare devilish stunts to impress the ladies (that keeps my mind off my buddies), but one time I had a more meaningful dream. I’ve only had it once and I’m hoping I can experience it again.

In my dream, I was sitting on a stone with a campfire burning in front of me. I could hear the flames crackle and the smoke fume as I gazed into the embers. The smoke rose into my eyes, making them water, but I didn’t shut them. I liked the tears that came to my eyes; it made me feel like all my problems were flowing down my face. Once my problems were gone, I turned around and noticed that my friends were socializing behind me, but the funny thing was that I couldn’t hear them. I could only see them, with their bright smiles and sparkly eyes, talking to one another. I felt happy and then boom, its 10 A.M. and I had to get ready for basketball practice.

I like seeing my friends having a good time, and that dream was the only time that I’ve seen them look so carefree and happy. I worry too much about my friends. I have constantly been told by then to “Mind your own business!” and to “Keep out of it!” but I just can’t. I care too much.

I guess you can call it love for my friends but I don’t think its love because I don’t receive that much concern back. In fact, I don’t think any of my friends has ever stopped me and even asked me “You alright?” I don’t want them to do it either. It needs to be something they realize for themselves; it just kind of hurts, I guess. I want them to be happy. I’ll just sleep on it.